Genesis 22:1-14: February 2005

Monday, February 28, 2005

in moments like this

dear God...
i just wanna tell You tt m really so tired...sch work is really taking its toll on me. i really feel myself on the verge of giving up...as much as i wanna depend on Your strength, i find it so hard...rite now God, i just pray tt You'll grant me the strength, wisdom, proper time mgt & discipline as i take tests & meet deadlines; sportsmanship, energy & safety as i play in law games; Your sustenance thru the week cos m getting very weary...just help me Lord...help me also to draw close to You & feel Your holy presence...
in Jesus name i pray
amen.

Sunday, February 27, 2005

to be like caleb

today's sermon, "Caleb...wholly followed the Lord" from deuteronomy 1:36, was good. a reminder tt we are to wholly trust God in all that we do. whilst the other spies saw the difficulties tt they'd face to get into the promised land, caleb saw God's goodness. the other spies said to head back to the desert becos they're unable, caleb said to go forward cos they were able. caleb was blessed by God becos he had 'anor spirit'...he trusted God wholly, unlike the spies.

many a times, when i face difficulties, sad to say...i tend to react like the spies...i start to have distrust in God...and as i sat there on the pew listening, i realised what a fool i've been so many times. time and again, God saw me thru each semester, yet i fail to trust Him wholly each time before the results came out. but after listening to today's message...i just pray that instead of doubting God in trials to come, i would really put my trust in God and wholly surrender to Him...

in numbers 14:24, God said "But my servant Caleb, because he had another spirit with him, and hath followed me fully, him will i bring into the land whereinto he went; and his seed shall possess it."

because caleb trusted God wholly, God blessed him and brought him into the promised land. becos of his obedience, his descendants to come benefited from it as well. indeed, when we obey and honour God, it is not in vain for God will also honour us.

as for the spies? they faced God's immediate judgment - death. from this we see that unbelief is a curse and let us pray, that we would always bear this in mind and always remember to trust God wholly and not doubt His goodness and power.

"i can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" phil 4:13

i pray that the day i meet my Creator & Heavenly Father...He would be able to commend me the same way He commended Caleb : )

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

THIS IS FOR YOU, GOD!

OH GOD!!!! THANK YOU SOOOOO SOO SOO MUCH!

for the first time in 20 years of my life, i saw fireworks - LIVE! haa, alrite...call me some 'mountain tortoise' but yeah, this IS really my first time catching it live. i never knew fireworks could be soooo beautiful! thank God for allvina who helped me find out when there'd be a fireworks display! haa...

i was really filled with excitement when the fireworks display came on! i've been praying all morning and pleading with God to just forgive me for skipping bible study class & prayer meeting this evening just to catch this...and was praying hard tt God would grant me good weather so i'd get to see it...thank God for being so wonderful!!!! and allvina was telling us tt today's display was exceptionally long...i know why! becos God knew i was gonna watch it and He's dedicating it to me!!! (heh heh heh) haaaaaa....THANK YOU GOD!!! LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH!!!

also...thanks dear & allvina, for being there with me to watch it! haa...really had a great time with you all...i hope we'll be able to catch something like tt together again yah?? and yes dear, we got to spend valentine's day together afterall! haaa...happy chinese valentine's day to one & all! *hugs*

Saturday, February 19, 2005

media team dinner

...at church was good. enjoyed the fellowship. really hope we'll do this more often...i pray tt this huge team would be really used by God to reach out to others. really thankful for YF meeting too. feels good seeing ppl i hold dear to my heart...but i guess they'll never realise how much. anyway, just thank God for seeing me thru anor week...God's really the Great Comforter who never fails to soothe every pain tt we go thru...my Shepherd of Love Who cares when i've gone astray, my One & Only Friend Who's there all the time -without fail. Thank You dear Lord, for being Jehovah Shammah - the God Who's there...

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

loneliness isn't scary

just realised tt i've outgrown my fear of loneliness, or so it seems. m no longer tt afraid of being out in shopping malls alone : ) i guess it's good to sometimes have my own quiet time...with my Shepherd of cos. (i can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. phil 4:13) but of cos, thank God for lydia & allvina who met up with me in the evening for dinner at sakae : ) was really nice fellowship...

oh, thanks a lot to mylene, mel, jiahui & yenting...for the really nice levi's polo top...haa : )

i finally had a good talk with my Father last nite. perhaps m feeling so miserable becos i haven't been committing my problems to God...and really...it felt really good to just cry out to God...as i sat on my bed talking out loud & yeah, crying to Him, i felt my burden getting lighter & lighter...just wanna thank God for being my Comforter, Counsellor & the Mighty Prince of Peace : )

Monday, February 14, 2005

valentine's aka friendship day 2005

okay, it's actually already tuesday morning since it's 12.17am...but i still want 14th feb to appear so i've changed the timing...haaaa...

just wanna thank God for today : ) m glad to have met up with gerald in the afternoon cos well, i guess it just says things are alrite now...and well, from this meet-up, i just confirmed one thing abt this whole issue : )

anyway, was really surprised to have alex out with us today : ) met up with allvina, dear (who deserted us for weijie!) and alex for dinner, walked arnd and ended up at starbucks. alex was prolly 'traumatised' by our sudden change of moods...haharz. one moment we were having oh-so-serious talks, and the next, allvina & i were playing this new game i invented (talking abt tt, i had better get tt idea patented soon eh!)...haharz : )

seemed like God was teaching me patience today...i had to wait for almost everything. waited for hours at dr ho's clinic, waited long to use the washrooms...oh well!~~~ anyhow, i just wanna thank God for being my Shepherd & Friend...also, blessed friendship day to one & all! *hugs*

oh yesh, blessed 28th birthday to alan!

"fulfil ye my joy that ye be like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind." philippians 2:2

Sunday, February 13, 2005

welcome to galilee : )

it's really wonderful how God reunites His children in His marvellous ways : ) as usual, after every service, the chairperson would invite newcomers to stand up so we may as a church welcome them...as i was sitting on the balcony, it was impossible for me to see who they were, so i just clapped along, not knowing and yes, m ashamed to admit this, but also not really bothering to find out who they were.

when service ended, i went down and looked for darrell to pass him his class's attendance book and of cos, looked around for my clique (argh, shame on me). but hey, who doesn't...haa. but as i was looking arnd, suddenly a sweet voice called out to me "gwyneth!" and when i turned over, i was pleasantly surprised to see my pri sch classmate, stella! how cool! even her mom could recognise me and i found out tt they were looking for a new church to settle in : ) spent most of my time at church introducing her to the rest and of cos, catching up with her...her sis, stacy, was also darrell's ex-pri sch classmate! tot it was really cool tt both our siblings were also classmates back den : ) anyway...really pray tt her parents would find joy in worshipping at galilee so stella & stacy would be able to stay too! really excited to hear also tt they're interested in YF : ) God has definitely blessed galilee with these new friends, incl steph, glen and their families, and i pray tt we on our part would do our best to make them feel welcomed : )

quite a no. of us went to town today and a few of us went over to PS to celebrate alan's birthday in advance. we were all rushing abt and waiting for him, and this fella made a guest appearance of only 5 minutes! FIVE minutes! ayeee...haharz, oh well...anyway, just wanna thank God for today! yay!

Saturday, February 12, 2005

cottage meeting at rev ong's

thank God for the sweet fellowship during YF today. thank God also for the love & hospitality of rev ong, auntie eng, and of cos my Best Friend & josiah, for opening their home to us. sat makes me happy...can't wait for next week...meanwhile, for the rest of next week, m just gonna hafta be grateful to be with just my Shepherd...allvina, u may sing along with me : )
In God's green pastures feeding, by His cool waters lie;
Soft in the evening walk my Lord and I.
All the sheep of His pastures fare so wondrously fine,
His sheep am I.

Waters cool (in the valley),
Pastures green (on the mountain),
In the evening walk my Lord and I.
Dark the night (in the valley),
Rough the way (on the mountain),
Step by step, my Lord and I.

Friday, February 11, 2005

His sheep m i

yay. 2 projs down...submitted my wills drafting proj & arbitration proj this morning. kinda sian to travel all the way to sch to submit work but yeah, at least i saw some law ppl and talked a bit here and there...

i decided to go down to the airport to see pa off. i guess things are fine now...but m not sure how i really feel actually. i just tink tt perhaps, there's still some anger in me...which explains why i hardly said a thing to him & mommy. not sure how long this animosity will last...n i find it so hard to allow God to remove all the hurt and anger in me...

spent almost the whole day myself...went to tm after submitting my work since i had more than 2 hours to spare before seeing pa off. how exciting can...esp when almost all the shops were closed. when i arrived at the airport, i still had lotsa time to spare and decided to go on a ride on the sky train. well, i didn't stop at just one ride. i took it up and down from terminal 1 to terminal 2...at least 20 times. yeah, m not kidding...n it actually made me realise tt life's kinda like a sky train. ppl come and go...just like how some frens come and go...some stay longer (well, apparently i wasn't the only one who took the train up and down more than once)...some leave, and come back again (when they need to get back to the other terminal)...well, of cos my life's better than tt of a sky train's...i get to travel wherever i want, tt train has to take the same route up and down over & over every day. -.-"

walking arnd cityhall alone wasn't tt bad either...i got to walk at my own pace, look at stuff for as long (or short) as i wanted to...yeah well, basically just do watever i want without anyone saying anything or bothering abt me...but 3 hours of tt...was scary. i actually started to feel lonely? yeah...so allvina, in case u're reading this, you're not the only one alone with your Shepherd.

okay...well, i went down to orchard too...sat at starbucks and wow, mag came to meet me and boy, was i glad...just wanna thank God for the time spent with her this evening...and yeah, other than tt...it was just a me-and-my-Shepherd day...baa~~ baaa~

Thursday, February 10, 2005

untitled

panic attacks. hyperventilation...they're just so not fun. loneliness isn't either.

Sunday, February 06, 2005

family reunion dinner

wooohooooo! daddy's home! here's just a lil sms exchange we had on thu nite.

me: so how abt you? u're coming back on the 5th? and wat have u got as my birthday present?
dad: work busy only can come on sunday. your birthday present is secret ha ha. you take care and...
me: how abt u just come back and i'll ask you for money?
dad: you want vietnamese dong sing dollars or US dollars
me: sing dollars would be sufficient, but US dollars would be great. a briefcase of them would be nice

tho he didn't come back with my briefcase of US dollars, he kept his word by giving me US$100! hahahahahahahahaharz, i still can't stop grinning as i type this. okay, by right m not supposed to get it already cos mommy already gave me a pretty big 'ang pow' on my birthday, and it's supposed to be from both of them. wooohooo! it sure feels GREAT to be daddy's girl! wahahahaharz...but thing is, now i've gotta do watever he tells me to...like when he goes "get me a can of 100plus"..."with ice"...oh well, who cares, i'll just do it, on account of the money! haharz, just kidding! alrite...i shall stop being money-faced.

anyway, had a great time with all my family...ALL my uncles & aunties & cousins turned up : ) steamboat was great, tho i couldn't stuff much down (cos dear & i pigged out at sakae's 2 hours before tt!~). and wheeee...i got 2 'angpows' from each uncle & auntie! grandma too! haaa...alrite...hush hush. but anyway, thank God for a really blessed time of reunion. m so grateful to God...cos it's rare tt each & every one turns up at grandma's...m glad dad made it home too : )

btw, i must really thank God this whole entry is up here, cos it actually got deleted by me...but thank God when i logged in again, it was JUST THERE! THANK GOD i didn't hafta retype it all!!! hahaharz

Saturday, February 05, 2005

YF reunion dinner

thank God for a really really wonderful YF reunion dinner : ) m glad it all went well, all glory to God! yup...wanna take the chance to thank eugene hui for doing grocery shopping with me, lydia & alex for preparing everything with me this afternoon and jonathan for helping me cook rice, and most imptly, God for being Master Chef! haa...looks like we make a pretty good f&b team eh?

"sweet surprise" photos (30.1.05)


me & my present from joanne!


ostracised? why isn't anyone coming into the picture?


okay, there u go~ me smiling blissfully in the arms of my friends! haa...[from left] eve, mag, joanne, me & shelia


my darling bro & me


josiah & me

Friday, February 04, 2005

thank you dearies!

thank God for a wonderful evening spent with ppl i love! really thank God for this time of the year, cos it just seems so hard to get everyone together on other days & this is one good excuse! haa...most impt of all, i thank God for giving me life. indeed, everyday i live is not a promise, but a chance from God... : ) and m so grateful for tt. thank God also for wonderful parents who brought me up the past 20 years...and of cos, auntie luz for taking care of me since i was a kid, while dad & mom were at work : )

i just dunno how to put my joy into words : ) but thank you - allvina, Best Friend, dear, fiona, ric, lydia, beloved ss, josiah, jaime, mag - for coming over, and making this evening a special one for me : ) thank God also for A who called from bangkok to wish me a happy birthday! btw guys, A says he misses you all : )

thank God also for eugene who willingly helped me with grocery shopping, tot he was really fun to shop with! : ) thank God also for lydia and an entire day spent with her (looking for a shirt becos she spilt rhumba on her polo)!

hee...yet anor gathering for us tmr at YF's reunion dinner : ) really looking forward to it!

oh yes, josiah, be careful next year, tell me u've got soccer again, if u wan me to make good use of the boxing gloves you gave me!


no way! 2 big candles but m still 16 at heart!


[from left] josiah, ss, Best Friend, darrell, me, allvina, mommy, ric, fiona, jaime & lydia!


my sweet girlfriendSs


special boys in my life ;) haharz (longest-di, darling bro, beloved & Best Friend)


group shot while watching 'american idol'


ayeeee...shouldn't have cut our hair! 3 of us with really short friiiiinge!~

Thursday, February 03, 2005

psalm 139:13-16

1/2 hr before i turn 20...well, as derrick says, technically, m already 20, from where he is now. never mind tt he actually knew it was my birthday becos of icq...becos i didn't really expect him to remember, or even bother at all. but well...the ppl i least expected to remember actually did...and my closest friends prolly don't...how cool eh? : ) could tell from their replies when i asked some of them "dinner at my place tmr, 7pm?". i got replies like "see how first okay?", "not too sure, confirm with u tmr" and best answer was "i've got soccer leh". hmm... : )

anyway, just before the clock strucks 12 here and my title as a Teenager gets eradicated from me officially, i'd just like to spend the last few moments thanking God for keeping me gng the past 19 years. i've truly been blessed with much...so much i can never count my blessings. life's really tough...it really is. as i type this, i start getting emotional...but you know...m so grateful to God tt i can take comfort in the fact tt He cares for me and will be there for me each step of the way...as much as i dislike having a "2" in front of my age, i just pray tt the Lord will continue to help me grow in wisdom and stature of the Lord.

use me God...i am Yours and Yours alone.

"For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb. i will praise thee; for i am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. my substance was not hid from thee, when i was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them." psalms 139:13-16

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

haircut!

haaa...guess wat? fiona, dear & me cut our hair today! met up with fiona for our appt at shirley mah's while shelia had hers cut at somewhere in holland v. and hmm...looks like we 3 ain't very happy abt our new hairdo! hahaharz...oh well, cheer up dearies! actually...we shouldn't be too bothered la. our hair will grow out fast, so take it easy!

anyway, thank God my IP's oral presentation's over : ) and most impt of all, really thank God tt my grp's on the right track! so yay! looks like our final report's not gonna be too bad afterall : ) just pray that this particular grp member would actually understand how we're feeling abt his absence & not-doing-work attitude. it's actually really tough with only 3 of us doing all the work all the time...and best of all, there ain't peer appraisal for this proj...so he gets watever marks we get too actually... : well, just really wanna give God the glory for seeing us thru this far for this proj...pray for me dearies! still got lotsa projs due, i tink 2 more are due 11th feb!

okay, anor thanksgiving: daddy's coming home on the 5th of feb! wheeeee! : )

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

accounting rocks!

rock my foot! haharz, some account geek's poem? aiyoh, just reminded me of ss when i first read it! m sorry dear! i just had to rip this off your blog. well, u ripped something off mine too, so it's okay la rite? just remember to put credits lorrr...there you go, this is from shelia xie's blog! (u ripped it off from ur fren's too rite. *bish*)
ACCOUNTING OF LOVE
I will CREDIT you my love,
If you will DEBIT me your love.
I'll record our romance in a JOURNAL,
And POST it to the LEDGER of my heart.
I'll keep an ACCOUNT of our love,
Based on DOUBLE-ENTRY.
This way you'll know the BALANCE c/d,
And the AMOUNT of love I have for you.
Our courtship is carried out on WORKSHEET.
ADJUSTING ENTRIES are necessary,
To make our love steady.
TRIAL BALANCE shows,
We are meant for each other,
Because the TOTAL of our love,
Is one and the same.
CLOSING ENTRIES are made,When down the aisle we take.
PROFIT & LOSS statement,Tells what has happened.
Let's see our BALANCE SHEET,
What are our ASSETS & LIABILITIES?
Oh, my goodness!It shows a dozen kids!