just to thank Him
it was here again. some discomfort, felt nauseous...and i started quivering and had difficulty breathing...but i wanna thank God so much for sparing me from a 'complete' panic attack. indeed, prayer works. i knew i could get through it by trusting God and focusing on Him cos i've done it once with His help...well, by God's grace, i really felt fine just moments after gerald prayed with me over the phone. the fear (something tt prolly only ric would be able to understand) of having to go through it again was hounding me as i kept praying to ask God for His mercy upon me...i really can't afford to be unwell now, not when sch has just re-opened and a class of 11 kids needs me at sch tmr...
i guess mommy's right abt me being pretty stressed up lately...and i thank God for helping me realise tt tonite. this incident kinda left me wondering too, actually, if i've really learnt to wholly trust in God...cos when i felt the attack, i was asking for medication...kinda felt desperate for it...telling myself how much i need it now to get me out of this. i can't believe it. how could i even tink of depending on them, when i have such a big God to depend on to get out of this...arggghhh. afterall, He's Jehovah-shammah, the Lord Who is there, and Jehovah-shalom, Who is able to give me peace in my heart! oh boy, what was i tinking abt... : (
i guess mommy's right abt me being pretty stressed up lately...and i thank God for helping me realise tt tonite. this incident kinda left me wondering too, actually, if i've really learnt to wholly trust in God...cos when i felt the attack, i was asking for medication...kinda felt desperate for it...telling myself how much i need it now to get me out of this. i can't believe it. how could i even tink of depending on them, when i have such a big God to depend on to get out of this...arggghhh. afterall, He's Jehovah-shammah, the Lord Who is there, and Jehovah-shalom, Who is able to give me peace in my heart! oh boy, what was i tinking abt... : (
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